The Bridge on the River Kwai (1957)

Today's film is The Bridge on the River Kwai, which focuses on a Japanese prison camp during WWII.  A huge troop of British soldiers and officers have been captured, and the director of the camp forces them to build a bridge for the Japanese army.  There's also an American who has been there for some time, but more on him later.

The main officer, Col. Nicholson, plays only by the rules and claims he and the other officers shouldn't be doing manual labor like working on a bridge.  The director, Saito, doesn't care about no stupid Geneva convention and wants as many people as possible working.  This becomes a battle of stubbornness between the two, and we know how stubborn men can be.  Eventually, Nicholson wins and the British set out to build a really good bridge.

Now this bridge becomes a source of British pride for Col Nicholson and he gets really hardcore about it.  He refuses to sabotage any of it, and makes his soldiers build it the best they can, so years later when the war is over, they can all be remembered for this super fantastic bridge of awesome.  That's in the middle of nowhere in a jungle.  They even erect a fancy plaque to commemorate the bridge. Really.

Remember the American dude from the beginning?  Well he escapes and with the help of local villagers, makes a miraculous recovery.  The navy wants him to go back and lead them on a dangerous mission through the jungle - to blow up the bridge on the River Kwai.  He really doesn't want to.  He spent a long time in the awful prison camp, suffered, and saw many people die.  He is starting to get over what he went through and they are forcing him to go back.  He agrees to go with them.  It takes a while but they do make it to the bridge.

They set up the charges to blow up the bridge, but of course Col Nicholson spots them and runs down to investigate.  He really gets in their way of blowing up the bridge, and causes the death of the soldiers responsible for blowing it up.  The soldiers tell him what the mission is about and he realizes he let his personal pride ruin what they were doing.  He falls on the plunger himself and blow up the bridge.  Now when he is hit he lands over there <----  and then falls on the plunger which is over here ------>.   Well that is remarkably convenient.  Overall it was a very enjoyable film.  I will give it a 9/10.

Roma città aperta (Rome, Open City) (1945)

Today's film is Rome, Open City.  This is an especially impressive film because it is about WWII and was filmed during WWII!  So like the danger was real for these people but they didn't care because they had a story to tell us.

There are quite a few films from this era made in Italy.  This country gets a lot of pity from me, because they were in the middle in the War.  The people were controlled by both the Nazis and the fascists, like nothing good comes out of that.  They were starving and broke, and then their controllers lost the war and they had to deal with that too!  It was a really rough time for Italy.

During this time, the Nazis had full control of Italy.  However, there are some rebels they are determined to get rid of.  Most of the film consists of these rebels and their families, and them hiding from the Nazis.  The local priest, Don Pietro does a lot to help the rebel cause.

I thought it was neat how they transferred messages with their secret code words and whatnot.  And one guy had a message inside a bullet!  Today we would just send a private text but it was so much harder back then.

In addition to the rebels, who all seem to be men, there are several female characters with their own stories.  One of them is a rebel's pregnant fiancee, who is gunned down in the street by the Nazis.  Another is a beautiful performer that gets tricked by a lesbian dominatrix Nazi into giving up vital information and then gets burned by her.

Eventually, the Nazis capture Don Pietro and two of the rebels.  The evil Nazi guy is trying to get information from the rebel, but he will not talk.  The Nazi tries to guilt trip Don Pietro into giving up information or convincing the others to talk.  But Don Pietro doesn't give up and refuses to meet any of his demands no matter how scary the Nazis are.  Don Pietro is straight up No-Flinch Kobe.  Of the two other rebels, one hangs himself and the other is beaten to death.

When the other Nazis ask what name they should use for the dead man, he gives a fake name, because he doesn't want to "create a martyr for the rebellion".  So instead, they decide the execute the priest.  So that's a better idea?!

This movie provides an interesting glimpse into the lives of people who lived under Nazi occupation.  I will give this film a 10/10.

Three Kings (1999)

Today's film is Three Kings.  Is it a war drama, a comedy, or social commentary?  Maybe it is all three!  At the end of the Gulf War in the early 1990s, 4 soldiers set about to retrieve some stolen gold.  And they get it fairly quickly about 35 minutes into the film.  The hard part will be getting the gold where it needs to go.

As they already trying to transfer the gold, the people of the region keep needing their assistance.  Pesky people and their constant need for help!  The soldiers do the right thing and help the citizens, putting their needs over the desire for gold.  There is a lot of commentary over the real reasons we went over there, as well as the current state the area is in.  Nothing that we don't already know, but  remember this film was made before Junior Bush sent troops to Iraq and reopened old wounds.  In a sense, this film could have been set more recently and we would not have seen much difference.  I will give this an 8/10.

Letyat zhuravli (The Cranes are Flying) (1957)

Today's film is The Cranes are Flying, which focuses on Russian families during World War II.  It mainly follows one woman and her family.  This is Veronika, who is in love with Boris and plans to marry him.  Boris's cousin, Mark, is also in love with Veronika and is a total creeper whenever he's around her.

Boris is smart and talented enough to avoid the draft, but he volunteers to serve his country.  Mark somehow escapes the draft, but we will learn how later.  In the scene where the soldiers are leaving for war, we see all of the families saying goodbye. There are new mothers holding tiny babies, looking very worried, as well as old grandparents who have seen war before. Most of the films like this would be propaganda about how great it is to serve, but we really see that this may be the last day any of them see their families.

Next comes the German bombings that destroy everything.  It's easy to see the Soviet Union as the faceless monster of communism, but it had real people who lived there, and millions of people died during the war.  Veronika loses her parents when their house is hit, and Boris's family invites her to stay with them.  During another air raid, Veronika hides out with Mark, and he takes advantage of the fact that no one is around and rapes her, then manages to shame her into marrying him.  We knew he was a bad guy creeper the whole time.  Afterwards, he is a terrible husband, ignoring her to play music and party.  Eventually we learn that Mark bribed someone to escape the draft and he is later kicked out of his marriage and his house.

Veronika works at a hospital as a nurse and sees many injured soldiers.  After one soldier has a breakdown because his girlfriend left him, she leaves to go outside.  She never meant to hurt Boris and she's stuck with someone else.  Meanwhile, Boris dies while trying to save another soldier, but she doesn't find out until the war is over.  At first she doesn't believe it, because he's listed as missing. She decides to wait until his friend, who volunteered with him, returns.  Unfortunately, he really is dead.  Meanwhile, she takes care of a child missing his parents, who more than likely were killed in an air raid.

When the war is over, the surviving soldiers return.  Boris's friend gives her a bouquet of flowers to show her he's sorry for her loss and tells everyone a speech about how they will never forget those who served.  Meanwhile, Veronika takes out the flowers from the bouquet and hands them out to others.  The film serves as a remembrance of all the Soviet soldiers and citizens who died in World War II.  It also shows how people grow up and change by war.  Veronika went from a goofy girl who called herself "Squirrel" to a mature nurse who takes in a child and stands up to her loser husband and kicks him out.  I will give this film an 8/10.

Platoon (1986)

Today's movie is Platoon.  It takes place during the Vietnam war.  The terrain was a lot different in this war than in the first two world wars.  Instead of mountains and farmland fields, there was dense jungle brush and swampland.

The main character, Chris, dropped out of college to volunteer to fight.  He learns that most people there couldn't afford college and were drafted.  They don't value him at first because he hasn't been there long.

There are a lot of stars in this film, and they all were cast outside of their type.  Charlie Sheen plays Chris, who starts out naive and sweet, and that is not like him at all.  The helpful Sgt. Elias is played by Willem Dafoe, who normally plays villains.  Sgt. Barnes who shoots everyone including people on his own side that don't agree with him, is played by Tom Berenger, who usually plays good guys.  John C. Mcginley, who usually plays asshole characters like Dr. Cox, plays Sgt. O'Neill, who is actually a nice person.  This shows that in this film, you can't judge people because they might surprise you.

The film was based on Oliver Stone's experiences during the Vietnam War, and he mainly wrote to counteract what he saw in the Green Berets, feeling that it was false.  I never saw that film so I can't comment on that.

One thing the war does is change Chris.  He starts out hopeful and wanting to help everyone.  He receives the tiniest scratch and believes that he will die.  After seeing his fellow troops massacre innocent civilians and burn down villages, his personality toughens up.  At the end, he is shooting people while covered in blood.  He tells the others that he's fine.  How will this affect him when he goes home?  Will he go back to whatever he was studying in college or do something completely different?  War changes people, and usually not for the better.  I will give this film an 8/10.

All Quiet on the Western Front (1930)

Today's film is All Quiet on the Western Front.  What? Two war films in a row?  Well, yesterday's film was from the French point of view, and today's film is from the German point of view.

The movie focuses on a class of high school boys, who are egged on by their teacher to join the war effort as soldiers to defend the Fatherland, Germany.  The boys all join and look forward to being soldiers.  One of their leaders also happened to be their mailman so no one takes him seriously.

Then, we get into the actual warfare, and the boys realize that with all the talk about how great it is to defend the Fatherland, no one said it was terrifying and filled with explosions.  People are losing limbs left and right, and other people get blown to pieces right before their eyes.  None of this was done for just shock value, it's meant to show us that this is what really happens during war.  The film gives us time to get to the know each of the soldiers, so it's really sad to see each one of them die.

There's also a discussion of how WWI got started in the first place.  I always get surprised when I see a motorcycle or truck in these films, but I have to remind myself that this was between 1914 and 1918, not the 19th century.  But I think I know the reason why.  I live in the South, and history here is taught war-by-war.  We spend a great deal of time learning about the Civil War, and then immediately jump into WWI next.  Civil War ended in 1865 and WWI started in 1914.  That's 49 years!  What happened in between those years? I don't know!  They don't even discuss how it happened, they just mention a quick blurb about it before jumping into WWII, which was started in 1939, which again is 25 years we miss.  Man, schools are shit.  I do know that Archduke Franz Ferdinand was murdered after dropping his album "You could have it so much better" and this made all the countries in Europe mad and they started shooting each other.  Now we have WWI.

The German soldiers in the movie also question why they were sent to destroy the French and English.  One of them says it's because one country insults another.  Also, the manufacturers get rich, and every good emperor needs at least one war.  One soldier, named Albert, says "I think it's more a kind of fever. Nobody wants it in particular, and then all at once, there it is. We didn't want it. The English didn't want it. And here we are fighting".

One thing to note that even though these are German soldiers, they speak English were generic (non-regional) American accents.  This is done so the audience can emphasize with the characters.  Germany was seen as our enemy back then, but they're not the "bad guys".  Even the French soldiers aren't the bad guys. One of the high school boys kills a Frenchmen while stuck in a hole and feels so bad about it afterwards (even though the dead guy totally blinks).

One of the boys, Paul, goes back to the high school while on leave, and the same teacher tells him to encourage the new, younger class to fight too.  Paul realizes that he can't say anything positive or heroic about being there, so he wants to go back to his friends.  Everybody ends up dying.  Imperial Germany lost over 2 million people in real life.  This is a great anti-war film because it shows an honest look at the brutality of warfare and wonders what the point of all the violence is.  I will give it a 9/10.

Paths of Glory (1957)

This week is the 101st anniversary of the beginning of World War I.  So today we are watching Paths of Glory.  In the first years of the war, the soldiers engaged in trench warfare, meaning they dug trenches and shot each other over an area called "no man's land" and didn't really accomplish anything except mass casualties.  The movie takes place during this time.

In France, the soldiers are busily fighting against the Germans, but remember everyone's still in the trenches.  General Mireau of the French army has been promised a promotion if his army can take over Ant Hill, which is controlled by the Germans.  Of course he says they could do it in one day without any backup.  He goes to order the colonel of the troops, Col. Dax to launch the attack.  We also learn Colonel Dax, played by Kirk Douglas, was an excellent criminal defense lawyer before the war.  Will this knowledge come in handy?

So, the next day, the French army storms across the no man's land to take over the hill and get obliterated.  Of course they did, they're French. They should be used to losing battles.  But apparently not.  Half of them can't even leave the trench because they're being beaten so bad.  General Mireau orders another group to fire upon the trenches, but they refuse to shoot their own men.  This just makes him even madder.

General Mireau tells them to pick out three men and have them tried for cowardice.  This is where Col. Dax being a lawyer comes into play.  He tries his best, but the trial is really just for show.  So the men are sentenced to die.  Later, Dax tells the higher up, General Broulard, that General Mireau threatened to fire upon his own troops and he's like whaaa.  But, he's not going to overturn the conviction, because that would be like admitting that the army was wrong, and he's not going to do that.

One thing that lets you know this took place long ago is the fact they were in trouble for cowardice.  In the beginning, General Mireau yells at a traumatized soldier and tells him there is no such thing as shellshock.  Well, there is, and now it is called post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and it still affects many people today, both soldiers and civilians.  Men are supposed to be brave and strong and not afraid of anything.  I feel bad for them because they couldn't even ask for help because even admitting they need help would be admitting they were a "coward".  In real life, thousands of men were tried for desertion and cowardice.  There are more steps taken to take care of soldiers affected by PTSD but even 100 years later, we still have a long way to go.

General Broulard offers Dax General Mireau's position, but he refuses it.  He goes back to see his troops inside a cafe gawking at a German woman onstage and he's like oh boy here we go.  But, she starts singing the song "The faithful Hussar (soldier)" in German and all the French soldiers start singing along with her.  For a moment, they're not German or French people who are enemies, they're just people.  This woman is supposed to be the enemy but she's never hurt anyone ever, meanwhile their own General just killed three of their friends for his own reputation.  Colonel Dax watches them and decides to wait longer before sending them back out to be killed in the trenches.  I will give this film an 8/10.

From Here to Eternity (1953)

Since this Sunday is the 87th Academy Awards show, I decided to watch a film that won best picture a long time ago.  So I chose From Here to Eternity.  I was very disappointed in this film.

There are different plotlines happening throughout the film.  We start off with Robert Prewitt who transferred into a new unit in Hawaii because he was passed over a promotion as a bugle player. He thought he was a better bugle player and left.  Yes, that is what we start with.  The captain wants him to box but he is like no way.  He blinded someone while boxing so that is understandable.

The captain puts him through all kinds of torture because he won't box.  So, all these soldiers do is drink, go to nightclubs with "hostesses" (whores), box, play around and do generally nothing?  This is what my tax money is paying for?

The only thing I knew about this movie was the makeout scene on the beach.  Turns out the woman is cheating on her husband, the captain, with his second-in-command.  She won't leave him but she sleeps around behind his back.  She uses him for his position and power.  She is a coward.  Even her boyfriend doesn't want to stay with her when she tries to manipulate him into becoming an officer.

Meanwhile, lots more drinking and whoring happens, and also a knife fight.  Because according to Prewitt, who refuses to box, stabbing is okay apparently.  He does box, once, however an obvious double was used as they don't even have the same hair color.  Also Sinatra is in this and he is terrible.  But he dies so there's that.  In the last ten minutes, the Japanese bomb the area so they all run around like chickens with their heads cut off.  Prewitt is wearing an Aloha shirt instead of his army clothes and gets shot for his poor fashion choices.

Prewitt's captain gets fired for treating him so badly because he wouldn't box.  In the book, he gets promoted instead.  However Hollywood was too chickenshit back then to insult the almighty government and maybe all soldiers and cops don't need to be worshipped.  The movie was a super sanitized version of the book. And who wants to watch that?  My disappointment makes me give this a 4/10.

Full Metal Jacket (1987)

Today's film is Full Metal Jacket.  Turns out its more than just my heart that sent me to the hospital, so I've had a ton of tests and I'm on lots of painkillers.  yaaayyy.  I am so high. So excuse my writing.

I really liked the first half of it, the half where the recruits are training to be Marines.  I have heard a lot of stories from friends who went through it, but I've never actually seen anything like it.  I thought the actors playing Joker and Gomer Pyle did a really great job.  Pyle tried so hard, but he is so dumb.  He can't tell his left from his right.  You can tell from when they march he messes up (left right left right) and that Joker has to teach him very carefully how to lace boots.

Even though Pyle tries hard, he ends up messing up every day.  So he finally destroys his main tormentor (the drill instructor) and then kills himself.  But thats not the end of the movie.  It jumps into the future where the war is.  So we see Joker and his friend as a reporter and photographer doing news stuff for the military.

The war is mostly boredom peppered with moments of terror.  We see mostly men throughout the film and the only women we have seen are all prostitutes.  So far.  Joker wears a peace sign button on his vest while his helmet says "Born to Kill".  He is questioned about this, and being the writer-type dude he is, says it has to do with the whole "duality of man" thing.  I'm out of it so the only thing I can think of is pink camo.  Like this sweet ass rug.  It's camo because we like to hunt and be outdoors.  And  its pink because we like girly cute things and twirling around.  Duality of man thing

Joker and his friend, Rafterman join a group as they near an abandoned area.  However, there is a lone sniper there who manages to kill a few people.  They decide to go in there and find the sniper for revenge.  And find out that the sniper is actually a young woman.  It is up to Joker to kill her, but it is obvious that he has never killed anyone before.  But, he does it and the war continues on like normal.  Just another day in the war.  I will give this film an 8/10.

The War Game (1965)

It's Groundhog Day today, and what is his prediction for the winter weather this year?  Oh, wait, I live in Florida, I don't care.  It's also the Super Bowl today which I am watching right now.

Speaking of the Big Game, I watched The War Game to review here.  It's not about a game at all, but about the devastation and panic that comes from nuclear war.  Sorry, but no matter hard hard you try, a bunch of sand bags piled up against your house, it is not going to help against a nuclear bomb.

The main concern is all the deaths, injuries, and illnesses that arise from these weapons. Also, there would be a lack of food and resources, and most of the land would be rendered useless by the radiation.  Soon, the land will collapse into anarchy. The film is presented as if it's a real-life documentary, as if everything is really happening.  Most of the film is all scare tactics, which makes me wonder, what is the purpose of this film?  Simply to scare citizens?  I don't know.  It's fairly graphic for a film from the 1960's.  What makes this film scary is the stark realism of everything that happens, there's no dramatization of anything.  I will give this film a 6/10.

Das Boot (1981)

Today's film is Das Boot, an awesome drama about life on a submarine with lots of explosions.  What I enjoyed most was the realism of how cramped the sub (or U-boat) was, and how it showed that governments don't necessarily represent the people.

Daily Life on the Sub

What struck me the most was simply showing how cramped the sub was and knowing how many people lived on it.  One bathroom for 50 men?  Yeah,  my sisters couldn't even share one bathroom properly.  I did like how when the sailors were running through the sub, the cameraman would follow, and it would look like I was running through the sub, too!  The filmmakers filmed everything from the inside of the sub instead of being in a huge set, to give a true sense of claustrophobia.

Inside my great-grandfather's sub.  I didn't take any photos
myself so this is the best one I could find.

This film gave me a greater appreciation for my great-grandfather, who served on a sub similar to this.  His sub was sent on several missions from 1941-1943.  A few years ago, I was given the opportunity to tour his exact sub.  Everything was left exactly as it was from 1943.  I could not believe how tiny and close everything was!  Also, all the old fashioned technology they used was so neat!  Granted, this sub held 65 men while the one in the film held 50,  but people still slept on hammocks that were stacked on top of each other.  Even though I have been in a sub, I never got to see on in action.  This film combined the small spaces with the panic of everyone experiencing the explosions (mostly depth charges from a destroyer).  Also, as the sub dives deeper and deeper, the pressure increases and could destroy it!

The Sailors 

You know, it's really easy to dismiss these people because they're fighting for Nazi Germany.  But they're not.  They're fighting for Germany.  Just like they did the World War I and everything else.  People serve their country, not their governments.  In fact, it only appears like there's one true Nazi on the entire boat.  That's the clean-shaven one.  So when everyone goes to the fancy boat,  the Nazis celebrate him as the captain.  He apologizes and points out the true captain, that is bearded with his hat on and looks like he came from an Hemingway novel.

The main mission is to bomb the merchant ships while avoiding the destroyers.  But guess what?  The destroyers still find them and drop their depth charges on them!  The captain assumes that "they must have seen our periscope".  What he didn't know was that the Allies had developed radar and was using it to find submarines underwater.

The Strait of Gibraltar

The captain has been told that their sub must go through the Strait of Gibraltar to make it into the Mediterranean Sea.  Everyone is upset about this, and for good reason.  The strait has many varying depths, and the best way to go through it without being seen is to go at night and ride the currents.  I did some research and found that a total of 62 subs went through, and 9 sunk to the bottom.  Out of all these subs, not one ever returned to the Atlantic Ocean.  Not one.  That's bad news for these sailors.

It turns out that this sub actually does sink to the bottom.  It springs a leak, and with almost nothing working out the sub, the sailors bail out all the water with buckets.  And the sub rises to the surface and keeps going like nothing happened.  Really?  Are you kidding?  There is no way that I will buy that this could happen.  No way.  And then, once they reach land and are celebrating, an air raid appears and kills everyone.  Wow, all that work on the sub, and they die right afterwards.  That has to say something, but I don't know what.
Anyway, for the most part I enjoyed this film.  Even if you don't like long films, this has more than enough tension, panic, and explosions (literal explosions! Lots!) that will keep you entertained.  I will give this film an 8/10.

San Pietro (1945)

Why does every man in the '40s talk out of the side of his mouth? Enunciate!!!

This is nothing more than a propaganda piece done by the U.S. Army.  The narrator only refers to the other side as enemies. Not Germans or Italians, not people, not men and women. Enemies. The narrator seeks to dehumanize them as much as possible. When the camera pans over the American soldiers, they are all smiles.  When the camera focuses on the dead, they are being placed neatly in white bags. Their hands are carefully folded. When the camera focuses on the enemy dead, the bodies are sprawled out in grotesque positions; their eyes and mouths wide open. After the battle, the townspeople return from their hiding places in the mountains to their homes, "the children all laughter and smiles". Meanwhile, the camera pans over their homes, which are blown to smithereens (the narrator never mentions this).

Unless you're in a high school history class and need to write a paper about World War 2 battles, there is no reason for you to watch this movie. I'm giving this movie a 4/10.

Shao Lin san shi liu fang (36th Chamber of Shaolin) 1978

Are you tired of watching the Academy Award winning films on this list, wondering why they won anything? Are you tired of watching heavily themed dramas from Europe?  Did you just watch a 3 1/2 hour silent film? Well, this review is for you! This movie gets straight to the point, and that point is
Kung Fu Fighting!!!!

San Te joins the temple at Shaolin in order to learn kung fu. He lost his family and friends to the evil Manchus, who are taking over China. He wants to bring this knowledge to the common man, so they can defend themselves.

When San Te first enters the temple, he is very determined to learn kung fu. But he spends his first year there cleaning.  When asked which chamber he wants to start with, he chooses the top, the 35th.  Obviously he is out of his league when he cannot say any of the verses, and the leader uses the Force to knock him down. He understands that he has a lot to learn, so he agrees to start at the bottom. Each chamber focuses on a technique or using a part of the body. There's the eye chamber, where he learns to focus. There's a wrist chamber, leg chamber, head chamber, all of them. He does exceedingly well in each chamber due to his perseverance.

The head monk asks him if he would help take charge of any chamber, except the 35th, which deals with the Force. San Te asks if he could lead the 36th. What? But there is no 36th! He explains that he wants to create it so the people can defend themselves.

The head monk kicks him out of the temple, but this just lets San Te do what he wanted all along. He recruits people to help him take down the general, and gives them great pointers on defense. The monks agree to let him lead his 36th chamber, and the villagers learn kung fu skills that will help them. Everyone is happy, except the bad guys who lose. Very awesome feel-good film with epic fight scenes. I'll give this movie an 8/10.

Note: Today's film's original title is Shao Lin san shi liu fang. It is also known as the 36th Chamber of Shaolin, and Master Killer. This is the reason why I post the film's original title first, because it can be translated in many different ways in other languages.

Inglourious Basterds (2009)

I wanted to like this movie. I really wanted to.  Quentin Tarantino's films are full of fun and violence.  When he was asked why he makes his movies so violent, he replied "Because it's so much fun, Jan!!"

Some moments were tense and full of drama. Other moments were full of action. The Nazis are evil and everyone enjoys seeing them get beat.  The Nazis are not 'people' like us. They are personifications of evil and deserve to be beaten with a baseball bat and branded.

I didn't like this movie because every scene dragged on and on and on.  I was so bored waiting for something to happen.  I completely lost interest near the end of every scene. And every scene came from something I've already seen before.  The entire scene where the American holds up the wrong three fingers in a German bar was a story my dad told me when I was little.

Why is this movie in the 1001 list? It is a fine example of revisionist history?  Hitler never went to trial or had to answer for his crimes. He killed himself before anyone could catch him.  But, here he dies in a barrage of bullets and fire. Do we feel that now he has received justice? What do we gain from this?

I think that if it's supposed to be a fun violent movie, I should be having fun. And I'm not. I'm giving this a 6/10.

Hotaru no haka (Grave of the Fireflies) (1988)

This beautifully drawn anime is not about dragons, magic, or robots from the far distant future.  This anime is a realistic depiction of a brother and sister coping with loss and navigating an uncaring world.

Seita tries very hard to take care of his little sister, Setsuko, and shelters her from the reality of what's going on.  He does not tell her that their mother died in the recent bombing. He tells her that she is going to a hospital in another town.

Their spiteful aunt reveals the truth to Setsuko. Their aunt has no intention of taking care of them and give them the most meager portions of anyone in the house. 

One thing that bothered me is why Seita never asked for help. He must feel helpless because his aunt refused to help them and doesn't trust anyone. But he needs to for the sake of Setsuko.  When he took her to the doctor, the doctor told him she needed food, but he keeps trying to provide for them on his own.  When he was caught stealing food from the farm and brought to the police, the police officer is kind and offers Seita some water. Why didn't he tell the officer they needed help? There had to be a place somewhere that took in children and fed them, or maybe a shelter for victims of the bombings.  We know that they have family in Tokyo, why didn't he look them up? I don't know my parent's address, but I can look it up if I want to visit them.

Think about how many drone strikes there are today. Think about how many bombs or leftover mines went off.  How many children were killed today?  The exact number is something we won't know.  The movie is powerful as it reminds us of the forgotten victims of war.  It also shows that animation is not just a medium of fantasy, but can portray the darkness of reality as well. For that reason I will give it an 8/10.

In the Year of the Pig (1968)

I never like watching movies about the War of Northern Aggression because that's all we were taught in history class. However, we did not spend one single day covering the Vietnam War, so all this is new to me. Everything I learned about it is from what I have read myself, and I learned a lot from this documentary. This documentary was actually made during the war, not after, so it's like everything is happening in real time.

The first indochina war lasted from 1946 to 1954. So why did the tombstones say in French, "Died March 18. 1885"? And there was another one that said 1876. What is the significance of showing these tombstones if they were from before the war?

We learn from this documentary that we went to Vietnam to stop Communism from taking over. No, we don't really care about the people who live there, we just need to stop Communism.

We don't ever see the documentary makers, but we feel their influence. Remember this: People may not remember what you said, or what you did, but they will always remember how you made them feel. However, this documentary is so dry it doesn't make me feel anything but boredom, but I did learn a lot.

It's rather eerie listening to these congressmen tell us their thoughts when we know what is really going to happen. They keep saying that they don't want to send troops to North Vietnam, and don't want to end lives, yet they think that destroying the military bases there and stopping Communism will be fast and simple. They are so arrogant they have no idea this war will not be fast and simple.

One of them said the "life of one American soldier is worth the lives of 50 chinamen".  He calls the lives of our soldiers "our most precious commodity." Yet when they ask the general why we should go over there, he replies, "Because of communism, our most despicable enemy." He says that we are going to crush Communism quickly, like we should have done in Korea.  Oh, I see. They're doing this because we lost in Korea and are so butthurt about it they're willing to try risking young men's lives again. Let me tell you something generals: My grandfather took shrapnel to the face while fighting in Korea for you assholes.

A senator tells us that we have not bombed civilians  We have simply bombed targets that happen to be in areas surrounded by civilians. What an arrogant jerk. The soldiers give us a different point of view by telling us about the racism and the killings in the area.

This documentary is informative and well put together. It seems that the fact our government lies to us is hardly new. I learned a lot and will give this film a 7/10. However, 1968 is actually the year of the monkey, so I am totally baffled by the title.

Cabaret (1972)

The only thing worse than a silent film about the Klan would be a musical that has Nazis in it.

I can't tell which is more awful: the songs or Liza Minnelli. The worst part is that she never stops talking. Not even when other characters are talking. She is constantly interrupting them with her mundane bullshit.  Nobody cares! And I read she did most of her own makeup and hairstyling. Obviously, because she looks like a drag queen most of the time.  I really wanted to chase her with the barber shears I keep in the bathroom and give her a decent haircut.  And I've always had a problem with anachronisms. Then I see this:

This is not '30s fashion! You are not even trying!

Then when I thought it couldn't get any worse, during the song "Two Ladies" or whatever it's called, there are flashing strobe lights. I'm already under stress because I took my daughter to the ER.  Stress+strobe lights=seizures.  Thanks Liza Minnelli, I haven't had a single seizure in over three weeks and I really was due for another one, wasn't I? Fuck you. This movie gets a -5/10 (yes that's negative five out of ten) for literally giving me a seizure.  There needs to be a warning before a film or tv show if it features flashing or strobe lights.

PS my daughter is okay now. She had some stitches and had to get a tooth pulled, but she feels great now.

Top Gun (1986)

A movie where some hot guys play volleyball with their shirts off. Also something about planes. I give this 7/10.

Apocalypse Now (1979)

This film truly shows the absurdity of war.  The story is about a man sent on a secret mission to kill a rogue colonel in Cambodia.  He travels by boat to get there, and sees all sorts of craziness. One dude is surfing while bombs are going off, and later the man passes a stage of playboy bunnies and witnesses the soldiers rush the stage. But he stays true to his mission, he's off to kill that guy.  But the colonel, whose name is Kurtz, is ready for him. He wants to die as a soldier, not waste away in the jungle. He tells him, "Horror...Horror has a face, and you must make a friend of horror." This movie is crazy, and violent, and dark, so I give it an 8/10.